Louisiana Republicans Vote to Maintain Celebrations of Confederate Terrorists
Let’s speak plainly about the Confederate States of America: It was a terrorist nation, using widespread violence for political ends, to maintain the enslavement of a huge number of people. Slaves were...
View ArticleThe USA Needs Robots To Do Jobs That Dogs Already Do To Deal With A Problem...
“In Brussels there was a bombing in one of the train stations as well. So we need to increase the surveillance and the security there, including dogs. As a matter of fact, our K-9 friends are some of...
View ArticleU.S. Deaths from Terrorism, 1995-2014
Considering recent claims that terrorism is an existential threat that should be driving Americans to costly actions such as expanding the budget deficit, eroding civil liberties protections,...
View ArticleShould we Save the Lives of 23,440 Babies? Should we Save the Lies of 629...
From 1995 to 2014, there were on average 184 American deaths from terrorist attacks per year. This fact has led many pundits to declare a vital need to violate the U.S. Constitution and spend many...
View ArticleBorders, Death, Medical Error And Donald Trump
Number of Americans killed per year from Muslim terrorists who have infiltrated the United States through the border with Mexico: Zero. Number of Americans killed per year by medical error: 251,454...
View ArticleMan With Gun Saves Kansas Graduation Ceremony From Invisible Terrorist Munchkins
Guns keep Americans safe, say gun advocates, and their arguments were strengthened this weekend by an incident in Kansas, where a man carrying a concealed gun saved a high school graduation from an...
View ArticleDonald Trump: American People, Vote for Me to be in a State of Constant Terror
Help, English majors! Can you diagram this sentence from Donald Trump on Twitter? I keep reading and re-reading and re-re-reading that sentence, and as best I can tell, Donald Trump is saying that: The...
View ArticleDonald Trump Advocates for a Ban on Irish Immigration to the United States
In Scotland today, Donald Trump reiterated his earlier promise to “suspend immigration from areas of the world when there is a proven history of terrorism against the United States, Europe, or our...
View ArticleDonald Trump Says He Wants To Commit Terrorism Against Democrats
TERRORISM: “The use of violence or the threat of violence, especially against civilians, in the pursuit of political goals.” – American Heritage Dictionary Today, Donald Trump announced that he wants...
View ArticleAnother Deadly Attack! How Many More Must The World Suffer?
First the attack in Orlando, and now this… Yesterday, between 14 and 28 people were killed in a series of bombings that appear to have been coordinated by an organization that has been training its...
View ArticleWhat Islamic State Fighters Did To Me in That Somali Neighborhood In Minneapolis
Following the example of J. Clifford, I traveled through the neighborhood of Little Mogadishu in Minneapolis, Minnesota last night. Readers of Irregular Times have repeatedly told us that this...
View Article1,982 Days Since National Terrorism Advisory System Started. Not One...
Under the old color-coded U.S. Government “Terrorism Alert” system, there was always an “elevated” risk of terrorist attack, a constancy that eroded away at the meaning of the word “elevated.” People...
View ArticleDepartment of Homeland Security Report Reveals Scope of Terrorist Attacks on...
Fifteen years ago, skyscrapers in New York City, the Pentagon in Washington, DC, and a plane in Pennsylvania were subjected to attack by terrorists. This single event, which led to the deaths of 2,996...
View ArticleTerrorists Are Going To Get You Any Minute! Quick! Spend $8 Million Per Year...
A guy placed several small homemade bombs around the New York City metropolitan area, but got the willies and could only summon the courage to place most of these in New Jersey. All but one of them...
View ArticleGeorge Holding Tells A Big Fib About Terrorism In The United States
Yesterday, Congressman George Holding strode up to the podium at the center of the floor of the U.S. House of Representatives and suggested that his colleagues are telling a bunch of lies about...
View ArticleDonald Trump Lied, Then Lied Again, About Journalists Not Reporting On Terrorism
This week, Donald Trump declared that journalists are purposefully covering up huge numbers of terrorist attacks, preventing people from finding out that the attacks have taken place. Speaking about...
View ArticleWatch for the Next NonExistent Terrorist Attack: Laptev Sea, March 6
Here at Irregular Times, we can connect the dots. We know where to draw the line. And that’s why our crack team of data scientists feel confident in predicting an event that is sure not to shake the...
View ArticleCongress To Consider Protections Against Imaginary Terrorism Act
Yesterday, Republican U.S. Representatives David Young of Iowa and Daniel Donovan of New York, with the cooperation of Democratic U.S. Representative Donald Payne of New Jersey, introduced H.R. 1238, a...
View ArticleTrump Saves USA From Anti-Communist Cuban Refugee Threat In The 1970s With...
There have been no refugee terrorist attacks in the USA this year. There weren’t any refugee terrorist attacks in the USA last year either, or the year before that, or the year before that, or the year...
View ArticleHelp Donald Trump Eliminate Homeland Security and Shrink the Military
Yesterday, Donald Trump issued an executive order directing the Director of the Office of Management and Budget to “propose a plan to reorganize governmental functions and eliminate unnecessary...
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